Monday, August 6, 2012

3 Ways to Handle Haters


In life there’s no avoiding getting haters. We all have our own world views and most of the time those differences will lead to clashes and conflict. It’s even more evident today with the rise of blogging and social networking sites like Facebook and Twitter. ...Here are three tips that I’ve followed and learned through the years that you might find helpful. --- Carlo S. Ople (http://www.carloople.com/)

1. Ignore them.

If there’s one thing you have to understand about haters is that they do not criticize, they attack. They take pleasure in putting you down. There is absolutely no point in trying to engage with them (especially online) because they’ve already made up their mind to shoot you down with their AK-47 even before you raise the flag for parley, lol.

Remove them from your immediate consciousness because they will just wear you down and cause undeserved stress. They can distract you from doing what you’re supposed to be doing. Remember: you can never please them or satisfy them.

What about the feedback that they give? If you have the strength, patience, and will power to see through the hate and find the nuggets of wisdom, then go for it. If not, don’t worry. You can always get feedback from non-haters and it will just be as good, if not better.

HOWEVER, if the time comes that there is a genuine window or opportunity for you to work with them and settle your differences, go for it. Take the initiative and be compassionate.

2. Focus on the work at hand. Keep shipping. Best defense is success.

If you’re worried about them tearing down your reputation then let me share one piece of advice that one of my mentors once told me: the hardest thing to argue against is success. If that’s the case then instead of giving your haters the time of day, focus on your work and in delivering successful products or campaigns.

If you’re just starting out, build on the little successes and let it feed your psyche so that you have the confidence, strength, and determination to follow through. Use your failures as a reminder so that you are more cautious and so that you don’t miss the important little details.

3. Spend more time with the people who really matter to you.

The worst thing you can do is get affected by haters and bring that negativity home to the people that truly matter to your life. Don’t get affected. If ever you do, cast it out before you go home. Draw strength, inspiration, and joy from the love of your family and real friends.

Most importantly, pray for grace. You will not be able to do this on your own.

Don’t get affected. Don’t get infected. Don’t spread it.

Focus. Ship. Love.